So I'm watching a movie with the wife last night...yeah, it was sort of a chick flick (though there were lots of pseudo-sex scenes with a pretty hot chick, so that was okay). Anyway, there's this part where a father is explaining to his son that he shouldn't let the girl get away...blah, blah, blah...life's short...yada yada...goes by quickly, etc. And I'm anticipating the next few lines of the movie and thought there was going to be a "if you let her go and make the wrong choice, life can also be very long" sort of thing.
But there wasn't.
Which is why I should write movies.
This kind of thing happens to me a lot, actually. Watching a movie or reading a book I kind of start anticipating what's going to come next (which I guess everyone does) and often I'm right but sometimes I'm...well, not wrong...just different...and better. But that often leads me to a new story idea, so that's okay.
In this instance, it led me to a Facebook/Twitter post (which you may have seen).
Thing is, it's true that life is short, that it goes by faster than we realize (particularly as we get older) and that we often never get around to doing or saying the things we want or should because we just let time pass us by.
Life can also be fucking long. If you have a life sentence in prison, I imagine things kind of drag by. Tick, tock....tick, tock...tick tock...hey, get your penis outta my ass, Bubba...tick, tock...tick, tock...
I imagine if you let the love of your life go (the potential fuck up in the movie) and end up marrying some shitbag, life could be a pretty miserable, slow slog.
Here's the Mike Kozlowski Theory of Hellativity:
The more miserable you are, the slower time progresses; the speed of time is directly proportionate to your level of enjoyment.
It's really easy to prove, so it's really more of a fact than a theory. A fuckin' Law, if you will. FUCK YOU! IT"S A LAW!
How fast do weekend's go by? Fast, right? How about Monday's, at work?
BAM! BOOYAH! SUCK IT!
Oh, there is a kind of sub-theory, too. The more shit you put off and ignore and don't do (stuff that you want to do or should have done), the faster time seems to have gone by when you look back at it from a future point. That's where that whole "where'd the time go?" thing comes in.
And so, in grand conclusion...uh...I got nothing...that's pretty much it, I guess.
Now, before I sign off and go do some shit to speed time along, I will give you a quick writerly-type update.
I'm working along on a new book. It's a bit of a departure from my usual fair in that it's really kind of a comedy thing. If you've read the Australia book, it has a similar feel...but different.
Have a notebook full of good notes and am into the 1st draft pretty well, sorting through the outline and such. Having some fun with it.
I've also got several short story ideas. Truth be told I've been slacking on those and need to get back to them. I've discovered that I'm no good at trying to plow through one project. I was really making an attempt on the zombie project and I kind of stalled. Not because the story went south but I think I was over-working it, trying to beat it into submission rather than letting it find it's own way into the light. That''s why I went in a different direction with the new project. There;s a nice balance and I think moving back and forth will be productive.
All that said, my need for instant gratification makes any longer project a real challenge. That's why I'm going to mix in some short stories. I like to see stuff done. It's invigorating.
Starting now I'm going to try to schedule two days a week for each long project and two days for short stories. On the seventh day I rest...because I'm god-like.
Obviously, if I;m in a major groove on one project or another I reserve the right to make adjustments to my schedule.
So, hopefully, I'll have some new stuff for you all to read soon. And maybe I'll even update the website (but don't hold your breath on that).
Talk to you all soon! Go do some stuff that doesn't suck and remember, if it seems time is flying by, you're probably doing something right...unless your looking back and seeing that it has flown by, in which case you may be doing something wrong.
You know, I'm not so sure this Law makes any sense at all...so it must be fucking brilliant!